Sober Bars: Helpful Or Hurtful For Recovery? (Part 1)

Sober bars may seem like a novel invention.

However, they’re far from new. These types of establishments actually date back for ages. In fact, in eighteenth century London, many gained notoriety during an abstinence movement and one of them, Mr. Fitzpatrick’s Temperance Bar, still stands (allegedly) to this day. Fast forward a bit and, like most good ideas, the vintage concept of a sober bar movement has been repackaged for modern times. While they’ve been fairly popular during the past decade, it seems as if these drink free hangouts have been even more widely advertised over the past couple of years. It isn’t too hard to figure out why, either. During the pandemic, alcohol consumption went up significantly overall as people started to telework in their jammies or recover from taxing shifts as “essential” workers. Those working from home would start drinking early because they could. Those who already drank to cope went a bit deeper into their vice. Many who relied on the gym to blow off steam, turned to the sauce also, as the sweat factories closed up temporarily. Copious memes joked about everything from bourbon for breakfast to getting lit during lunch between Zoom calls. It was meant to be satirical and funny. However, what always happens with this insidious brand of humor is a subconscious takeaway. And the takeaway here was that, “If everyone else is joking about this and sharing it – it must be normal. So it’s not so bad if I follow suit…”

Cut to the post peak pandemic time, though…

And now those who escaped with their lives have to live them normally again. And those who developed a temporary dependency on alcohol or relapsed from preexisting alcoholism are looking for a means to free themselves. But, how? Alcohol wasn’t just their crutch, but also became a form of socializing. From social distance patio parties to returning to the bars as they slowly re-opened, drinking became a part of their life without them even realizing it. So what fills the void after that? After they try to quit? Some people find new hobbies and rituals. However, for some ensconced in the “going out” scene, the sober bar has become popular: a place where one can go, enjoy nightlife, drink mocktails that taste similar to their favorite former spirits, and socialize sans the bad decisions and liver issues that come with alcohol. Sound good in theory, right? In fact, one newly sober lady even took it a step further and did something that was actually kind of smart by starting her own sober bar, called Absence of Proof. It’s a wise move because investment bias is very powerful. And so is identity. And so is the desire to drink. She’s only been sober since 2022. However, by investing money, time, and public and personal image into a business that’s all about being sober… she’s doing a darn good job of creating a fortress against potential recidivism.

And that’s great for her… but what about you, a patron of these places?

The pros are that it does indeed offer a spot for night owls who don’t drink, it’s a great place to meet like minded people who you know also don’t drink (at least at said establishment), and it’s a great segue into sobriety if you’re even just curious about the lifestyle (but don’t suffer from actual alcoholism). There are drawbacks, however. And they pertain more to those who come to this site for the title; for those who have an obsession with alcohol. The dangers of bars like these start with the fact that they’re “too similar” and could serve as a gateway back into old ways of living. Looking over some of the “shop” tabs, the mocktails and various zero proof elixirs are designed to taste very similar to gin, bourbon, and other favorites. Now, while the taste of a favorite poison (minus the feeling that follows) might be an ideal way to break the habit, it could also go the other way. This could be triggering to a recovering addict and lead to relapse.

Equally problematic for recovering addicts and alcoholics alike – is the social circle.

That’s not to say that people who come to sober bars are necessarily bad influences. However, they may not be optimal company for someone looking to quit and stay off alcohol. Many patrons to these pop up bars are not alcoholics. They are not addicts. They don’t have any obsession or fixation with any given substance. Some just notice that they feel better sans the hard stuff and opt to take a break without sacrificing the social element. For others, it’s just curiosity. The danger for someone recovering is to see people who seem similar (because they’re partying without the “party” part) and to think that maybe they can live like that too – abstaining on Monday and drinking on Friday. The problem with this? Those who are just there as tourists and who plan on hitting the pub tomorrow night don’t have lifestyles an addict can match. The addicted cannot have even one drink. The further into their recovery they get, it gets easier to accept that friends drink while you don’t. However, early on, the company you keep and the locations you choose are crucial for success in sobriety.

Keep reading to learn what a better alternative for successful sobriety looks like….

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